


Don't Want To Take Things For Granted

by katychan666



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Aftermath of the episode, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Season 3 Episode 7 - Salt in the Wound, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-05-01 04:06:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14512179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katychan666/pseuds/katychan666
Summary: Set after Alec and Isabelle bring Jace back to Magnus' loft. While they wait for Clary to make it back, Magnus tries to come up with a potion that would reverse his elixir again but doesn't have such success. And the things he said to Alec at the Institute stuck to him... and he needs to tell Magnus that he doesn't want him to risk his life for him. And to tell him that he doesn't take him for granted.





	Don't Want To Take Things For Granted

**Author's Note:**

> Oh what an episode, my God!!! It was so so good, man, they're stepping up their game *__*  
> I loved Alec giving Biscuit the hug, then talking things out with Magnus!  
> Oh and I loved Clary in this episode, she was so badass!  
> Just everyone was amazing overall <3

Even though Magnus was out of ideas how to reverse the elixir that he had given to Lilith, he wasn't about to give up so soon. Not when it was partially his fault as well that Jace was like that; unable to love. His elixir tore out his ability to love and now Jace was just an empty shell of a man he used to be and it was eating Magnus alive. This kind of guilt was unbearable. It was eating him alive, slowly clawing at his chest and consuming his entire body. No one else blamed him, but he sure as hell blamed himself.

He indeed was a fool, he let a Greater Demon inside of his home, completely unaware of it. It was no surprise that he was let go of his position as a High Warlock, he was a disgrace to all warlocks. He couldn’t even recognise that Lilith wasn’t a warlock; he knew something was off, but he didn’t trust his instincts and now it came to bite him in the ass. He looked down and clenched his jaw when he saw that the potion he was working on now was a fail once again and he let out a loud sigh, then he cursed loudly and threw the flask across the room, which ended up crashing against the wall with a loud thump.

Alec and Isabelle perked up when they heard the loud cursing and Alec looked at her sister, then to Jace, who was still trapped and was now just absently staring in front of himself, making Alec’s chest tighten and he flinched when he heard a crashing sound coming from Magnus’ office, Isabelle going to him and Alec looked at his sister.

“Go to him,” whispered Izzy and Alec nodded, but he didn’t want to leave Jace. “He needs you.”

“Yeah, but,” muttered Alec. “I need to be here for Jace too,” he then added and swallowed thickly when he heard more things crashing in Magnus’ office.

“Magnus needs you more than Jace right now,” said Isabelle and Alec nodded, because he knew that it was true. By the Angel, Magnus must’ve felt so guilty right now and Alec’s stomach fell. “Besides, it’s nothing you can do for Jace right now, it’ll be fine. I’ll watch over him, you go talk to Magnus,” said Isabelle and squeezed Alec’s shoulder, who nodded.

“Thank you,” said Alec and chewed on his lower lip as he was slowly making his way to Magnus’ office. “Yell out for help if he tries to do anything, okay?” asked Alec and once he got Izzy’s promise that she’d call if Jace would try to escape, Alec allowed himself to leave his sister and go see what his boyfriend was doing, hurt settling in his heart when he saw Magnus.

Magnus was at wits ends and he threw another flask against the wall and he then buried his face into his palms and let out a loud groan, grabbing onto his hair out of frustration and he then shook his head. Alec opened the door wider and let himself in, Magnus straightening himself up in his chair and forced a little smile on his face, just to calm down Alexander.

“Alexander,” said Magnus. “What are you doing here? I thought you’d be with Jace, he needs you now and-”

“You need me more than Jace does,” said Alec simply, stating that Magnus was his priority and Magnus looked down. “Don’t do this to yourself,” said Alec, because Magnus kept silent. “And don’t pretend to be fine when you’re clearly hurting. We don’t push each other away when things get hard, remember?” asked Alec and slowly came closer to Magnus, who let his smile disappear and a troubled expression came onto his face.

“I’m sorry Alexander,” huffed Magnus. “I can’t seem to reverse the elixir. I tried everything… _everything_ and it doesn’t help,” said the warlock and looked down. “I’ve gone through so many books, had Catarina over before to help me and nothing… absolutely nothing. I spent the entire day trying to reverse it and it’s impossible,” he said and gritted his teeth. “I’m such an idiot,” he then added and placed his hands together in his lap, twisting his fingers nervously.

“You didn’t know,” said Alec simply. “I said that you shouldn’t blame yourself,” he said. “We’ll find a solution like we always do. Together. It might take us some time, but we’ll come through in the end,” said Alec and made a short pause. “Have some faith.”

“Perhaps you’re right,” said Magnus, the corners of his lips twitching up, forming a quick and tiny smile, but if fell quite soon after that and he finally gave up with the potion mixing and he just shrugged. “But I meant what I said, I will fix this. I’ll bring your _parabatai_ back,” said Magnus and Alec felt shivers running up his spine when he remembered what Magnus said to him back at the Institute.

_Even if it’s the death of me._

Alec let out a hitched breath and swallowed thickly. “Before you said you’ll go to any lengths to save him… even if it would cost you your life,” stammered Alec and Magnus looked up at his boyfriend.

“I meant that.”

“Please don’t sacrifice your life,” blurted out Alec and looked down, then stepped closer to Magnus hesitantly. "It’s bad enough that Jace has been compromised, but the thought of you wanting to sacrifice your life for my _parabatai_ … I can’t… just the thought makes me-"

“I’ll make things right, it’s my fault,” said Magnus, interrupting Alec. “If I don’t bring Jace back I won’t ever be able to forgive myself. I’d rather die myself than to watch you lose your _parabatai._ ”

“Stop saying things like this, Magnus,” said Alec under his breath and made his way to Magnus, who was still sitting down. “You’re saying this only because you feel guilty,” he then added and Magnus looked up when Alec cupped his cheek. “I love you. I don’t want to lose you,” whispered Alec with a small voice and Magnus pressed his lips together, firming fists with his hands.

Alec wasn’t playing fair. Besides, it wasn’t the time to be discussing each other’s feelings. Lilith was on the loose, they needed to catch her…

Magnus placed a hand over Alec’s, which was still resting on his cheek, and gave him a sad smile. “I love you too,” said Magnus. “But now it’s not the time to be talking about this,” he then added and Alec narrowed his eyes. “Stopping Lilith is more important than…” started Magnus, but his voice trailed off when Alec slowly sat on top of his legs, straddling them and he hugged his face with both of his palms, Magnus smiling just a bit when he felt the warmth of Alec’s palms welcoming his face.

“There’ll always be something,” started Alec and Magnus cocked his head to the side. “A mission… a war,” he said, Magnus slowly smiling when he saw that Alec was quoting him again from the time they had their first date. “I just,” he stammered. “If something does happen, if Lilith does attack and if we don’t… make it,” said Alec, almost forcing those words out. Magnus felt his heart breaking again. “I don’t want to take anything for granted. Especially not you.”

“Can’t argue with that, you raise a valid point,” said Magnus and closed his eyes when he felt Alec’s thumb gently caressing his cheek. When he opened them again, his glamour was down and Alec let out a gasp. “In the time we’re waiting for Clary to return, I guess I can make some time for you,” he said, sounding kind of playful and Alec gave him a smile back.

“Thank you,” breathed out Alec. “So are we really okay? About the fight earlier.”

“Of course,” said Magnus. “We both said things we regretted, then apologised and made up,” said Magnus simply and Alec felt the weight lifting off of his chest and he gave Magnus his signature smile, meant only for Magnus and the warlock found himself smiling back.

“Good,” stated Alec and slowly leaned in and pressed his forehead against Magnus’. “I hate it when we fight,” he whispered and Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec’s waist, who nodded.

“As do I,” said Magnus and Alec slowly opened his eyes.

“So would it be okay if I kissed you?” asked Alec, just to make sure.

“I’d be offended if you don’t,” said Magnus and even though Alec’s smile fell, he leaned closer to Magnus, kissing him again and again.

Magnus opened his eyes when he felt Alec trembling in his arms and he pressed him closer because he knew that was what Alec needed. A hug. He had been brave and Clary’s rock earlier that day, but he needed someone to hold him and tell him that things would be okay as well. “Shh, I got you, come here,” said Magnus and Alec nodded. “You’re fine,” he whispered and Alec nodded.

“Yeah, everything will be okay,” said Alec and relaxed in Magnus’ arms.

“Yeah,” said Magnus and kissed Alec.

But both knew things weren’t going to be fine just yet, no one was prepared for the hell Lilith was preparing to unleash upon them. The whole Shadow world was compromised and the Downworld and Shadowhunters would have to work together and trust each other more than ever if they wanted to defeat Lilith. There were bound to be countless casualties, but after every storm, there came a sunshine.

So better, brighter times were ahead of them, they would just have to survive the upcoming storm first.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> Comments and opinions are well appreciated =)  
> Come visit me on [Tumblr](http://katychan666.tumblr.com/) :)


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